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This one is just tasteless (and hilarious).
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This one is so gross its awesome :D
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"Naw BITCH, I ain't here to rob you! I want a mothafuckin job!":lol: |
"How's a brother supposed to make his way in this world on handouts? I need job skills motherfucker"
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:lol: "police warn that the SUDOKU killer will kill either 1, 4, or 9 victims next."
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The one on the ninja parade was the best. I still laugh just thinking about it.
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I don't know why the Fast Food ones are so interesting to me:
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Because they're too close to true stories :lol::lol:
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Biden Requests To Be Named Special Envoy To Reno
WASHINGTON—Saying there are national security matters that "need sorting out down there," Vice President Joe Biden requested Friday an appointment as special envoy to the city of Reno, NV. Saying he had already done some of the preliminary work necessary to establish relations with the city, Biden assured President Obama that he had even made significant headway with a local dignitary named Candi. "Though the United States has not, historically, found it necessary to establish diplomatic relations within our own boundaries, the vice president did make a very convincing argument," White House chief of staff Rahm Emanuel said. "Although I'm not sure why he was so insistent about getting diplomatic immunity for the weekend." While Obama was noncommittal about the appointment, he did grant Biden the special 26E2BVP license plate the vice president had been asking about for months. |
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I'd rather be raped than wear fur. :lol:
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Tweaker's Rights Now Now Now Now Now Now Now Now Now Now Now Now!
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A 45,000-word proposal was drafted by members of TRN during a marathon, 72-hour meeting under the Roosevelt Bridge, and presented twice to the Senate Indian Affairs Committee. The document, which includes schematics for the development of a giant "spider bomb" the size of Rhode Island, concludes repeatedly that the problem would best be combated with large quantities of methamphetamines and steel wool.
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Fork Manufacturer Introduces Fifth Tine To Accommodate Growing American Mouthfuls
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Sweet, I can stop using a pitch fork!
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I thought this one was pretty funny
Today Now! Interviews The 5-Year-Old Screenwriter Of "Fast Five" http://www.theonion.com/video/today-...iter-of,20188/ (though, funnier in concept than in execution, which is true for a lot of The Onion) |
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